I’ve always loved to write. And read. In early 2017, I was re-introduced to a series of books that would change my life in an unforeseen way—the Circle C Adventure series by Susan K. Marlow. The books were perfect for me as a thirteen-year-old and jam-packed with some of my favorite things: family, adventure, and no overbearing romance. I collected as many copies of each book from the series as I could get my hands on and kept them in a special shelf on the headboard of my bed.
When I found out there was a way to connect with the author over her blog and through email, my obsession grew, until I was coming up with just-for-fun fan fiction stories about her characters and even entering one of her writing contests (where I placed second in my age category).
The following year, God parted a huge river for me when Mrs. Marlow asked me to write stories/posts for her on her blog. I was absolutely ecstatic. Of course, I said “Yes!” This was an incredible opportunity I had never even dreamed would be possible. I was fourteen years old at that time, and barely in high school.
Writing short stories about Mrs. Marlow’s main character, Andi Carter, became a comfy and familiar pastime, due partly to the fact that it seemed much easier to stick with a fictional character already made up and thought out by someone else than to invent one on my own. Some of my blog posts were later compiled by Mrs. Marlow and her publisher into two books that release next year (2022).
But then came the time God (and my parents) encouraged me to move on and “broaden my horizons.” I had to agree it felt like I’d traveled full circle: first an anonymous fan of the CCA series, then a contest winner, then a writer on Mrs. Marlow’s blog, then an editor for some of her books, and then finally a judge for another one of her writing contests. Almost none of it had been expected or even hoped for.
Still, closing this super-special chapter of my life was really difficult. Where would God call me now? Mrs. Marlow had become my mentor with plenty of the advice and experience I lacked at the beginning of our relationship, and now I wouldn’t be hearing from her as often. Was I ready for this?
I’m sure Elisha had similar questions spinning through his mind when he knew Elijah was about to leave him. Sure, he’d seen some pretty awesome stuff in the time he’d been with him and knew deep in his soul that God, who was sovereign over his life, was faithful, but still the doubts pressed at him. Elijah had been there for him and was the human counsel Elisha had needed for a season. Now, Elijah’s work was fulfilled, and God was taking him away. What would Elisha be and do without him?
It was then that Elisha had to make a specific request for God’s double portion of the Holy Spirit in his life because he realized that when left completely to himself, he was nothing.
The sermon from this past week was definitely an encouragement to me. Elisha pressed for every moment he could be with Elijah. Three times Elijah said, “Leave me,” and three times Elisha pleaded to stay. Likewise, I felt the nudge a couple times to go forward with my life, but God ultimately had to prepare my heart for that separation from what was simpler and therefore preferred.
Elisha had to be reminded it was God, not Elijah, who had made the way for him. Elijah was simply an instrument God chose to use in Elisha’s life. Similarly, I had to be reminded it was God, not Mrs. Marlow, who made the way for me. And I could move on trusting that the One who’d never failed me before wouldn’t fail me now.
Our Savior is capable of breaking doors of bronze and cutting through bars of iron to carry out His purpose for us (Isaiah 45:2). He goes before us; the same Lord who calls us by name (Isaiah 45:3) is even now parting rivers in our lives and allowing us to cross through on dry ground. Our God is with us always to the very end of the age (Matthew 28:20).
As Pastor Noll brought up in his message, God wants us to be at the point where, unless He steps in, we’re done for. That’s when we’re totally Spirit-reliant instead of self-reliant.
Like Elisha, we’re to beg for that “double portion” of God’s Spirit that will sustain us. In any and all areas of our lives, we need the Holy Spirit to flood through us, growing us in the grace and knowledge of our Creator so that we’ll have the confidence and the ability to look to Him for help.
Even now, as my family prepares to move my older brother into college, we’re experiencing a change we hadn’t thought to count on. My parents did an amazing job raising my siblings and me as a younger generation for Christ, and now our Connor is continuing on in the ministry God ordained for him. We’re excited for him—we truly are—but also grieved for ourselves. There are a couple of us especially who don’t want to say “good-bye.” But again, God’s assurance to us is that He will finish what He started (Philippians 1:6). We are called simply to follow, trusting that He will see us through.
Looking back and seeing all the ways God has provided for us should give us the confidence we need to take this next step in His plan for our lives.
Elisha lost a mentor and had a literal river before him he had to cross. I had an uncertain future. My family has to give up one of our members to a college located six hours from where we live. And yet through it all, God is still providing and teaching His chosen ones to depend fully on Him.
Do you feel there’s a river God has called you to that’s in front of you right now, one you’re wary of crossing because you’re not sure if it’ll be parted for you? I encourage you to think back. How many rivers has Christ parted for you in the past? Don’t you think that same Christ will continue to be with you and lead you on in the future?
Image credit goes to my sister Marah, who took this picture of me with my Andi Carter book collection as of 2020